Forgiveness.

for·give·ness

   [fer-giv-nis]  Show IPA

noun

1.

act of forgiving;  state of being forgiven.

2.

disposition or willingness to forgive.

Forgiveness seems like a simple idea but it isn't.

I'd like to think that forgiveness will take away the hurt, resentment or anger but it doesn't.  It feels like forgiveness is one of those lies we tell ourselves to make it "ok". Forgiveness isn't a magic eraser that deletes the event from your mind.

I think about the people or things that I am mad at and ask myself:

 What happens if I "forgive" them?  Will they do it again and think it's ok?

 Will it change how I feel about the person or thing?

 Will I be happy with myself if I forgive them?

Maybe forgiveness is just accepting whatever has happened,  maybe it's turning a blind eye or maybe it's just giving up... I don't know

Is it forgiveness for me to just concede in my mind that I am not going to let whatever or whoever it is bother me anymore and move on? I feel like saying "I forgive you" is like saying "whatever you did, no matter how bad, it is ok".

I guess in my mind letting go and forgiveness are not the same.

Thoughts????